"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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