Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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