Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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