I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
