were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I came so hard my ears popped.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
