is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
