you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
