I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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