If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
