If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
