nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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