Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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