margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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