Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
either way he was missing a nipple.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
