No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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