You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Randomize
