It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Randomize
