i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
