She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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