So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
