If i come over, it means nothing
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
