You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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