Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Randomize
