im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
