they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
