i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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