Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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