But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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