He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Randomize
