I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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