gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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