went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
