i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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