Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
