Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize