hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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