It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
