In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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