he puts the penis in happiness.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
