I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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