Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
