he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
