I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
