im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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