Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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