So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
