She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
wow bdsm is so cute
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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