4 words: hood of his car
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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