WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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