OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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