Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize