Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I look better un-naked...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
